God Have Mercy On Our Hangovers

"Mercy" is a new product developed by Alex Ott, a celebrity bartender- apparently there's celebrity everything now: chefs, trainers, stylists, baby clothing designers... but anyways, it's caffeine-free and you can drink it during or right after drinking so you can wake up with less of a a pounding migraine. There's like science involved, something about gluta-blah blah and aceto-blah blah, which I read about on their website, and sounded pretty legit. There's even drink mixing suggestions, it's a possible future mixer for your Patron.



One of their selling points is that it also prevents face flushing. The explanation is pretty funny actually:

"If your body can’t break down acetaldehyde, as is the case with many individuals of Asian descent, it can cause alcohol flush. More commonly known as “Asian Flush,” symptoms include a reddening of the face, dizziness and nausea, which can ruin anyone’s night. MERCY helps your body break down acetaldehyde and alleviate those symptoms."

Yeah, people don't believe sometimes when I tell them that I'm cheap date because it's racially genetic, they think I'm just trying to make being a light weight sound not so wussy. Suck it!

Drink and Bike

There's laws against biking and drinking too, actually, so... yeah. But if you bike a lot, or don't have a car, or are trying to lose weight, what better way to lose weight than biking to the liquor store to buy some beer? Maybe you could buy some light beer... this frame cinch allows you to wheel home with a six-pack. How hipster! Just envision yourself weaving between that traffic jam with a pack of Miller High Life or PBR strapped between your legs. I hope you were wearing a plaid shirt and and unlaced combat boots too. And you were on your way home from an indie show. And you are also wearing a fedora. Am I taking this too far?



Of course this is a product of some Etsy genius.

No Glass Allowed at the Pool?

Whiskey in a can! Bring it to the beach and the pool, and tell the cops to SUCK IT!!! And then offer them a can of whiskey, because they might be pissed you're telling them to suck it. It's not actually scottish, it just says it on the can for marketing purposes, but who cares. Apparently sometime in the near future, they will be producing similar products for gin, vodka, and other types of hard liquor. I kind of have been doing this for years (everclear in a plastic water bottle?), can't believe I never thought to sell it. Because, who wouldn't want to buy the bottle of hot, cheap liquor I've been carrying around in my purse?


Buy Some Whiskey!

This Is Not a Dream. It Is Real.

Yes, this exists. The Grill 'N Chill Tailgater with Draft System. It is a portable grill with an ice chest, radio/CD, and a draft system. All on wheels, although it doesn't exactly look easily transportable, the wheels do make me love this more. Like, seriously, what else would you need to tailgate? I can imagine myself wearing a cute apron flipping the steaks and sausage and chugging a beer. Maybe when I die, this is what heaven will be like.

Hops Holster 12 Can Ammo Pack

For only $29.95 you can drink like a champ. Because we are waging a war against sobriety.